Are we afraid of having too many fish?

In the beginning of Luke 5, the disciples have a bad day of fishing. Jesus, to have some space from the crowd, gets in a boat and teaches from there. Afterwards, Jesus tells them to lower the nets to fish some more. After some discussion, they finally do, and bring them in so full, they nearly sink the boats.

It is at this point that Peter pretty much freaks out.

The nets were filled and yet, instead of rejoicing, Peter was afraid. Aren't we all a little bit like that? Afraid for things to be too good? And so we sabotage ourselves, just a little, to make sure that our nets never get too full - as if losing a half -full net would hurt less than losing the whole thing.

We don't really intend to, but I think we listen to our inner critic (or our outward critics), or we allow people in our lives to get in the way of our success, or we think we're not worth what it takes to get where we want to be.

Peter is suddenly afraid because he is faced with the true person of Jesus and he can't handle it. In this pivotal moment, he freezes and essentially says,"You don't want me!" - and yet Jesus claims him as a disciple anyway, and gladly.

What a hopeful moment that becomes then for the rest of us! Peter, Moses, Isaiah - all say to God, "You've got the wrong person. I am NOT good enough." And yet, God chooses who God will - for reasons unbeknownst to us.

Not that I think God intends for us to all be successful in every endeavor. But perhaps understanding that our creator loves and accepts us, can give us permission to do the same for ourselves.